Fiat is a Latin term meaning “Let it be done.” In its most basic theological meaning, it is the total, unreserved surrender of self with which Mary, the mother of Christ, answered the angel Gabriel when she was asked to become the mother of God. A fiat is a complete surrender of yourself to something greater. A lesser known fiat of Mary occurs when she is holding the broken and dead body of her Son after his crucifixion. In this moment, she again surrenders, unknowing, to the divine wills of her God and her Son.
Fiada is a Gaelic word that refers to the cloud of mist that St. Patrick of Ireland would call down upon himself and his disciples when they were being hunted by druids. “The Breastplate of St. Patrick” is a prayer in Gaelic called the Feth Fia that begins “I arise today/through the strength of heaven/light of the sun/radiance of the moon…” St. Patrick used this prayer to call down the mists which rendered him invisible and thereby protected him and his faithful from martyrdom at the hands of their enemies.
When it was clear that Lizzy was going to be born on or near St. Patrick’s Day, I began researching a middle name that would be associated with St. Patrick of Ireland, who is one of my favorite saints. Since Lizzy’s conception and birth had been shrouded from the beginning in mystery, I settled on “fiada” to remind me of the miracles that surrendering to the unknown and unseen can sometimes bring you. After she was born, I began a blog called “Fiat in Fiada” to describe my journey to becoming Lizzy’s mother. After Lizzy died, I found I was being asked to say yes to something that I didn’t want and couldn’t understand. I ended up changing the content of my blog to describe a different type of unknowing to which I was now being asked to surrender myself. This blog is the chronicle of that surrender in the midst and mist of unknowing.